2016: A year of Expectation or Anticipation?
December 31, 2015
As 2015 draws to a close, Kristine and I send all of you our crazy-deep thanks for walking the planet with us. Our Matters That Matter work continues, and we love it as much as ever. We are also each finding work that fills our individual souls… please, oh please, visit Kristine’s website to see what she is up to… Bean Pole Pottery Every piece she makes takes one’s breath away!
Molly is about to launch her new business – Trailhead Coaching and Consulting. In anticipation for her website going “live” (mid-January) here is a final post to end 2015 well, and step into 2016.
It’s almost here.
A new year.
As I sit at my desk writing this post, outside my window, it’s winter. 3ft of snow, icicles hanging from the roof, the sun moving across the sky while never clearing the tree line, and the world seems to be holding its breath, quietly waiting for…. something.
Just back from visiting friends and family, having spent time with some of those we love most, it seems that there is a theme afoot among those we spend time with. That theme? Anticipation. Every single conversation over the holiday season shed a different speck of the same light on the year ahead. No one knows for sure what is coming, what exactly lies ahead, or what specifically is over the next rise. But one thing they do know for damn sure, is that “it” is coming their way. They are anticipating its arrival, not expecting it. They are preparing for it, not planning for it. They are listening for it, not talking to it. They are holding it lightly, not gripping it tightly.
Expectation is enclosed, signaling a kind of certainty, and like a practical-minded project leader, it is focused on what should happen. Anticipation has an openness to it, a sense of wonder and childlike delight, giddy about what could happen.
Expectation is a spotlight. Anticipation is a sparkler.
Expectation seems cramped, a wee bit suffocating and expects you to color inside the lines. Anticipation feels spacious, with room to breathe and room to roam.
Expectation is certain. Anticipation is curious.
Expectation likes information. Anticipation loves imagination.
Expectation favors control. Anticipation is fond of courage.
Expectation is an expedition. Anticipation is an adventure.
It might be easy to think that they are the same thing, but as we head into a new year, I suggest they are not. We aren’t just haggling over semantics here. Expectation casts the future in concrete, setting us up for disappointment and disillusion, since life rarely works out exactly as planned. Anticipation on the other hand, opens the door to new possibilities, leading us on an adventure of discovery and delight, as life unfolds in new and unexpected ways.
Expectation or Anticipation?
Each is a mindset.
Each is a choice.
2016: A Year of Expectation or Anticipation?
Your choice.
The Gift of Pain
March 26, 2015
“Be sure and stay ahead of the pain.” Words from the pharmacist years ago as I picked up yet another bottle of addictive pain medication for my 20 year old daughter who had recently had her tonsils removed. Being a “push through the pain” kind of girl, I asked her just what the hell that meant anyway. It seemed to me that having the courage to tough it out was the better approach. One to be proud of and that showed the strong stuff of which I am made. “The body, when faced with the choice of dealing with the pain, or healing the injury, can only focus on one of those and, in the proper order” she replied. ” Resolve the pain. Heal the patient.” In other words healing is hindered when pain is ignored. Heading back home, I resolved to help her heal by helping her resolve her pain.
Our bodies are but a microcosm of the greater whole. Found embodied in our relationships and in the body of the world, pain is everywhere. Close to home and in the farthest reaches of the world. It is within our hearts and our homes, amidst our communities and countries, in the halls of our organizations and schools. Unresolved pain is wracking our planet and threatening our shared futures large and small, and is an indication that there is healing to be done.
Pain hurts. Deeply. Acutely. Sharply. Chronically. Our natural reaction to pain is to avoid it. Afraid of the hurt we react in fear, provoking ancient coping mechanisms. Fight, flight or freeze.
Putting up our dukes and hitting back causes further injury.
Running for cover furthers us from the healing we long for, but can’t see because we are facing the wrong direction.
Hunkering down and refusing to budge drives pain deeper and healing further away.
When it comes to resolving the pain in our lives, none of those lead to the healing that is waiting for us on the other side. Wherever the pain exists, it is calling us to attend to it fully, in order to more fully live. It requires that we dive deeply into the pain in order to get to the bottom of it.
Pain is our call to action in order to heal that which is broken.
Pain is the canary in the mine alerting us that we are running out of air.
Pain is the lighthouse exposing the rocks which will dash our ship to pieces if we don’t steer with care.
Pain is the warning sign alerting us to dangers ahead.
Pain is the breadcrumb path that leads to wholeness.
Pain is the care package that must be unwrapped in order to receive the gift of healing.
Healing trumps holding on to old hurts.
Healing beats clinging to our stories that keep us stuck in old chapters.
Healing always outlasts winning.
Healing outshines the darkness of resentment.
Healing is a cut above the festering wounds of unforgiveness.
Healing forges wholeness out of the holes in our hearts.
Wherever the pain, it is the doorway through which healing awaits. Pain speaks the truth. The truth sets us free.
Matters That Matter ® 