My Private Tony Award

December 31, 2010

who among us doesn’t have a story…one we tell others and one we tell ourselves. There isn’t a person, given enough time, that can’t teach us a thing or two about overcoming adversity, fear and insurmountable challenge. It always makes me feel like a small part of something so powerful when someone confides in me what they have had to do to wake up and face yet another new and often impossible day. The experiences each of us goes through contributes to the depth and richness of our lives. It is the things we face, the heartaches we bear that do in fact make us stronger and our lives richer…eventually.  If we manage to survive what often times feels like un-survivable, we have stories to tell that prove the notion that we are each stronger than we think we are.

then there are the secret…dirty little secret…stories we tell ourselves. the theater is dark, the stage is empty and yet we execute an entire drama inside our heads; stories of self loathing, stories of inadequacies, stories of worthlessness. I have one…over and over again I see it and hear it and it tells me that I have never been, nor will I ever be successful at anything. depending on my circumstances, levels of depression, lack of self-confidence the story can render me helpless. My story of inadequacy, as ridiculous as it may seem to others, makes perfect sense to me. I know it, I have cultivated it and shaped it for years and years…It is my story and I am sticking with it (no matter how much therapy there is).

yet the “stories” that others live by, listen to and believe are so completely ridiculous to me. how many amazing writers among us, wake up each day and feel that today is the day they will be discovered for the fraud they know themselves to be. or how many gorgeous young women spend day in and day out comparing themselves to any number of photo-shopped images and find that they are disgusting by comparison. how many young devoted mothers tell themselves every minute of every day that they are doomed to be the same kind of distant, unfeeling parent who raised them. how many men live day in and day out with feelings of inadequacy around what they can provide and how they can compete; young teens who beat themselves up on a regular basis because they are different from the norm.

what is it about the negative thoughts that claim the lion’s share of our thinking brain cells? why does one or two or even ten disparaging remarks/thoughts carry so much more weight than the thousands of uplifting ones we are likely to hear in a life time.

I am voting that the mantra for 2011 be… I AM ENOUGH. How about that for story…how about that replacing the countless hours of self doubt; the wasted comparisons to those who look like they have it all…because I know those people, and the stories they tell themselves are the same ones you tell yourself and I tell myself. the secret dark theater thoughts where the story comes alive and is real enough and vivid enough that the Tony Awards should have a category for performances such as these. those people, the ones who must be so very confident,  are looking at you and thinking that you’re the one who must have it all together.

each of us deserves a break from self-imposed suffering. we do.

I know you, I read your brilliant thoughts; I am humbled by your beauty; in awe of your unlimited capacity for love, creativity and stunning accomplishments. You are more than enough. And the deal is if you don’t know and live as if you are, you confirm the shameful story I tell myself. Because I watch you, am inspired by you and follow the examples I trust you to create.

You are enough, and I hope to be just like you someday.

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The MATTERS THAT MATTER W OMEN’S RETREAT.  A room filled with courageous, bright, authentic women. We ate, we danced, we drank good wine & coffee (as promised), we laughed, we cried, we drummed, we napped, we created, we learned from one another, we loved with all of our hearts and souls. Women gloriously being women. Could it get any better? Well maybe if Amy Ferris (Marrying George Clooney) could have been there!

BRINGING COURAGE, CONTENTMENT & GRACE TO OUR LIVES

March 5, 6 & 7 2010

Glenwood, Washington

“We all know that our lives and daily choices are best governed by our most deeply held values, beliefs and priorities. Yet there is much to distract even our best of intentions. Rather than thrive by following our hearts & what we know to be true, we often struggle to survive amidst demands & expectations other than our own.”
RETREAT
Believing that learning can be a collaborative & supportive process, all offerings are both participatory & introspective in nature. The time together will include teaching, storytelling & conversation, as well as carefully designed thinking & writing exercises.
For the past 12 years, Molly & Kristine have been sought after as guest presenters & keynote speakers at national conferences, health spas, public & private settings around the country. They are experienced at building a powerful sense of trust & connection with participants.
Now they are offering their inspiring work in a beautiful, quiet setting where you can reflect, renew & restore. Come & join them at the MATTERS THAT MATTER Retreat at the base of beautiful Mt. Adams & be inspired.
COURAGE
To stand in the presence of fear.
CONTENTMENT
To be at peace with the contents of your life.
GRACE
To accept & extend goodness in the midst of an imperfect world.
Molly Davis & Kristine Van Raden
MOLLY is a successful corporate trainer. A gifted & engaging teacher, she brings humor, real life strategies & heart to the experience.
KRISTINE is an accomplished artist. Her creative vision and inspiration bring depth, wisdom & compassion to their work.
MOLLY & KRISTINE have been best friend for over 30 years. Friendship, family, career and life challenges have taught them about what truly matters. In 1997 they co-authored the internationally published book, Letters to Our Daughters. Since then they have inspired audiences around the country with their message. They share their own stories & experiences along with those of the myriad of women they have met along the way.
THE SETTING
40 Inclusivity Ln. Glenwood Wash. Gorgeous Private Home with stone fireplaces inside and outside…Room for art, conversation, relaxing, morning yoga and more!
TIME
Check-In: 4PM Friday
Wine & Dinner: 6PM
Evening Welcome & Retreat Introduction: 8PM
Retreat Concludes: 12:30PM SundayMEALS
Dinner provided Friday Evening
Breakfast Sat. and Sun.
POTLUCK Lunch on Sat. & Dinner Sat. Night
Saturday Lunch: Bring contributions for a hearty salad to
be shared.
Saturday Dinner: Please bring something to throw into a
kettle of hearty soup.
Bring a bottle or two of your favorite wine to share.
Local wines will be available to sample & to purchase.

SCHOLARSHIP PROVIDED FOR DRESS FOR SUCCESS

Retreat Cost: $150.
Includes workshop sessions, artful journal workshop & materials.
Payment for the retreat made directly to Matters That Matter@
40 Inclusivity Ln.
Glenwood. Wa 98619
REGISTRATION for the workshop closes January 31, 2010. Space is limited to 20 guests.
Book Early!
www.mattersthatmatterblog.blogspot.com
www.mattersthatmatter.com
mollyd@mattersthatmatter.com
kristinevr@mattersthatmatter.com
360-910-8232
Lodging

Available at the Flying L Lodge…a 5 minute walk to the retreat. Please book your room directly with Mt. Adams Lodge.
509 364-3488
flyingl@mt.adams.com
Directions to the Retreat
Travel east on Interstate 84 to Hood River. Take Exit 64 &
cross the toll bridge (75 cents) Turn left on Hwy. 14. Turn
right on Alt. Route 141 towards Trout Lake. Proceed to stop
sign at top of the hill. Turn left. Proceed 12 miles to BZ
Corner. Turn Right on BZ-Glenwood Hwy. Continue 19
miles to the town of Glenwood. Turn right at stop sigh &
head east through town 1/2 mile Turn left on Mt. Adams
Hwy. Proceed another 8/10 mile. Turn right onto Inclusivity
Lane. Continue approximately 1/2 mile and turn into the first
driveway on your right.
The Mt. Adams Lodge is about 1/2 mile from the retreat by car
and a 5 minute walk through the woods.

We are thrilled to say that our first retreat, March 5,6,&7 2010 is nearly filled. There are a few spaces left, but time is of the essence. We are so excited to share this experience with the amazing women who have registered and given themselves the gift of self-discovery and relaxation. If you are interested in attending or being placed on an email list to be notified of future retreats please email us at kristinevr@mattersthatmatter.com or mollyd@mattersthatmatter.com We promise to have a new and improved web site up and running within the next couple of weeks. YEAH!!!!!!!!!
BRINGING COURAGE, CONTENTMENT & GRACE TO OUR LIVES

By Clarissa Pinkiola Estes Best selling author of Women Who Run With the Wolves

“Ours is not the task of fixing the entire world all at once, but of stretching out to mend the part of the world that is within our reach. Any small, calm thing that one soul can do to help another soul, to assist some portion of this poor suffering world, will help immensely. It is not given to us to know which acts or by whom, will cause the critical mass to tip toward an enduring good. What is needed for dramatic change is an accumulation of acts, adding, adding to, adding more, continuing. We know that it does not take everyone on Earth to bring justice and peace, but only a small, determined group who will not give up during the first, second, or hundredth gale. One of the most calming and powerful actions you can do to intervene in a stormy world is to stand up and show your soul. Soul on deck shines like gold in dark times. The light of the soul throws sparks, can send up flares, builds signal fires, causes proper matters to catch fire. To display the lantern of soul in shadowy times like these—to be fierce and to show mercy toward others; both are acts of immense bravery and greatest necessity. Struggling souls catch light from other souls who are fully lit and willing to show it. If you would help to calm the tumult, this is one of the strongest things you can do.”

Endless Possibility

February 6, 2010

Have you ever had a creative idea that fills you to overflowing? The idea surges through you like melted chocolate on a gigantic hot fudge Sunday. With it the voice of possibility…This is it! I am going to be the first, the successful, the famous, the only, the ONE! No sooner are you filled to the brim with possibilities than another voice starts to whisper…Who do you think you are? You will never make any money. What will your friends and family say when you fail?

Why is it that the whisper usually beats out all those possibilities? Most of us back off, kill the idea and go about business as usual.

But then, every once in a while, there is a creative idea that will not be whispered into oblivion. It insists on capturing a glimpse at the light of day. If it can just capture those first rays of light then maybe it will start to grow.
We are stepping over our fear, tuning out that incessant whisper and exploring a couple of endless possibilities. Amazing how alive you feel when creative ideas are nudged forward.
What creative idea do you have that is waiting for a little light?